I think one of the most important aspects of raising a child
with Auspergers autism is expectations.
Specifically, being aware of my expectations and being prepared to
revise them. I get bogged down with the
everyday trivial crap, the backtalk, tantrums, delaying, dawdling etc etc. I have every expectation that MrD will be
able to drive a car, to graduate high school, to have a meaningful job or
career, and to have an independent life.
He is smart and capable and once in awhile I get these blessed
reminders. I just finished a school Integrated
Education Plan (IEP) meeting, and there is success being reflected there. His behaviours are much less frequent and
less disruptive than the elementary school reported to the high school. He’s passing all his classes. He’s still bouncing around socially, trying
to fit in.
I am so glad to be past the elementary school system. Children are treated in such a disciplined
and narrow way where there is no room to determine independent learning or
growth other than as an adult professional tells you. Educators are limited in the scope of what
they can accomplish, but they forget they have training and a toolkit of skills
that they don’t always use. I am only
one parent, I influence the home environment.
It drives me crazy to be the one reminding the professionals that THEY
are the adults, THEY are the ones that should be able to handle what flies
every day. How is it that a child can do
this so routinely, so regularly, and yet be a surprise each and every
time. In a way, is he smarter than the
professionals and enjoying running circles around them? It is no different that when your dog runs
away, and then does running fly-bys, enough to collect the food you are
offering or a pat & then run away again.
Who is running the show there? Other
students are learning by MrD. He giggles
about the English teacher teaching about how to properly use a colon. Every time she says the word colon, he
giggles. Soon enough classmates are also
giggling too. Disrespectful? Yes.
Funny? Darn tootin’ yes! He has learned that humor is universal social
situation butter, and he figured it out all on his own. He has dabbled in multiple social experiments
of misbehavior over the years. I think
it is amazing that he has graduated to humor.
Unfortunately, he doesn’t understand the same joke every day isn’t
funny. Neither is repeating the same
slap-stick physical joke is only a one hit wonder. Maybe he will be the next Jim Carey?
