Good news, MrD apologized for his earlier lie about not having homework. When another chance arrived, I asked him, "think carefully before you reply, Do you have homework?" To which he immediately started to blurt an answer, stopped himself, and answered, "wait a minute" & went to check his backpack. He proceeded to dig out his homework and do it, no problem. He is concerned about being trustworthy and it bothers him to be considered anything less. Hoorrayy for small miracles!
I recently wrote about natural consequences as a possible outcome for choices. Recently MrD was schooled there. He was (as usual) in his own little cloud, minding everyone else's business, the last kid out of a local sports group he goes to. Somehow his jacket was missing, but another was left in its place. He was very upset thinking that someone had stolen his jacket. I'm not pleased either, but I'm not angry. Losing a brand new $35 winter jacket, purchased just in the nick of time for cold weather is annoying. I did send him right back in to check the lost & found bucket. MrD was escalating his tantrum and in a nasty mood over it. I had a hard time cutting through that to tell him to knock it off and listen to me. We talked about the fact that someone probably took his jacket by mistake. I told him that this is only one thing that can happen when you don't pay attention to the things going on around you and be on task, it could be worse. If at long last he "gets-it" it will be a cheap lesson for his lifetime remembering. Unfortunately his favorite toque was in the pocket and may be lost for good. The most interesting thing about life lessons, they usually stick. We talked through the fact that if someone really needed it, I would have preferred they ask rather than take it. I am well aware that MrD is the one who needs the jacket, that is who it was purchased for. It was important to revisit the concept of kindness and not vindictiveness over this mistake. Teaching kindness is important, but I don't want him to be a "push-over" either. That's life: Balance, imbalance, learn, repeat.
We had an event like this a few years ago where he insisted he had to take 3 brand new shirts to school to show the teacher on the last day of school. He was really excited about those shirts as they had glow in the dark motifs on them. He argued with me relentlessly that he had to bring them, that he promised. He couldn't answer when I asked him what he would do if they went missing, other than to argue that they won't. I relented and allowed him to make the mistake. As predicted they were set aside and lost in the shuffle never to be seen again. I didn't like being right but he needed to find out the hard way. He still argues relentlessly about certain things. It makes me curious what the life lesson will be that changes his mind about arguing extensively.
