September brings grade 8 into our lives for MrD. Its exciting and scary. I remember vividly certain things about grade 8, the chaos, the newness, the anticipation, then the eventual, "that's it?" I'm a generation X gal, apathy was the flavour for everything. Much Music, neon colours, Goth, heavy metal, bubble-gum-pop-music, and more advertising than any generation before. This and a family with heavy influence in critical thinking and social games, not much was a surprise it seems. Now I see it was full of so much extremes and contrast, but it was normal.
MrD doesn't always handle transition well. "Front-loading" helps, in which we talk about what's coming up next, sometimes in great detail. With enough preparation he does quite well. If we're going to the mall, he knows that is a big busy place with lots of people milling around. It used to be I'd have to remind him of the environment, which stores we needed to go to, and what we needed to do or get while we were there. With practice it is enough now to know, we're going to the mall. Familiar transitions are almost always easier than new experiences, that seems to apply to everyone. Strangely we have transitions every day to get out of our house to go out that have resistance attached. I still haven't figured out if its anxiety fueled or control or rebellion. Its getting to be the same way to get out of the car once we're home to go into the house. Its a mystery to me.
The elementary teacher-aid & high-school counsellor have done a phenomenal job of front-loading the high school experience. MrD has had numerous tours of the high school at different times of day, seen the layout, walked the halls and learned what he will be navigating. There have also been discussions about crowded hallways, awareness of body space, how much space a backpack takes & not to club people with it accidentally. There have been giggling conversations about farting in busy halls, so there's definitely an awareness of noxious odors! Then there's the daily schedule, students go to the teachers, opposite to how most elementary school programming is. Time also has to be measured and judged. "I forgot" or "I got lost" aren't excusable for very long. MrD accepts these new big transitions quite well. I suspect it is because he has not had a traditional one family upbringing with the same friends in elementary school and high school that I was so bored with during my education. Then there's the interesting remixing of friendships & enemies, strange alliances that aren't obvious, and the ever present hormone soup swirling around. That there is the monkey in the system, the mystery to why locker slammings, stuffings and bullying in general appear. Kids know the rules, so they're subtle, they do things when adults don't generally catch them. That's the big dread of grade 8. Unpleasant events once, or repeatedly are enough to make anyone snap. I'm hopeful the grade 8 year will be a success, yet I do not have much faith in the school system after all the subtle bullying episodes from elementary school.
